Now Appearing For One Night

RDP Wednesday: THEATRE

Photo A.M. Moscoso

Does your life really flash before your eyes just before you shuffle off this mortal coil?

I read an article where scientists and Doctors wondered if it might really be possible after they examined an EEG that was being recorded as a patient suffered a heart attack and died.

The Data in this case suggested that what they were seeing was the brain recalling memories in the same way a healthy living brain does.

I was intrigued- and I’m not a Scientist or a Doctor so I can let my imagination run wild here-

so in this thirty second window how did the Patient see his life? Old memories first? Were his memories appear in an  orderly fashion Or were they jumbled up  like  “A big ball of wibbly wobbly, timey wimey stuff” ?

For a split second as I read the original article I thought of my computer- and what it does when I transfer data- it works and works and when it’s done I get that message that says something about the upload or download being complete.

This is the part when I took that little step to the wild side and wondered, where then did all of that data in a dying brain go? It want’s to go somewhere, that’s what I think. The brain is storing and recalling memories but  for who? All those little brain cells know they’re in trouble and they’re trying to save- not the heart or the lungs but the memories.

It’s trying to save who you are.

Photot A.M. Moscoso

Maybe in the end we get to sit in a cool theater with red plush seats. Maybe the walls are plastered with fancy artwork. Maybe you get to sit there with a giant bowl of buttered popcorn in your lap and a soda and maybe the dogs and cats and the people who you loved the most that went on before you are there too-

and when the curtains go up, there on the screen is are  the stories that mattered to you the most- and you get to share that with them. You know to catch them up on what they missed and to remember how much fun you used to have together.

It’s a theory, it’s a dream but when it comes down to it, my guess and your guess is as good as anyone else’s- and just as valid.

The Human Remains


Photo A.M. Moscoso

There was a run of suicides on the tracks  my train uses last month- there was at least one a week.

Some people suggested that the inconsiderate jerks who threw themselves under the train should have stayed home and ‘eaten a bullet’.

My question is- which child in the video was the person on the tracks and which was the unfeeling ‘ let then eat a bullet ” child?

At what point did those people become so emotionally detached from their own sense of humanity that they allowed themselves to be torn apart by  a speeding train or would open their mouth and say without a care in the world for how it would say to a train car full of people that ‘ that  SOB should have stayed home and eaten a bullet, sorry your life sucks but I have things to do- I have a life. “

I know the person who ended their life has my sympathy- should the people who suggested that the deceased should have ‘eaten a bullet’ for the sake of the convenience of those around them have it too?

And if if I deny either of them my sympathy and caring what does that say about me? If I don’t care about myself or other people and I keep feeling that way,  do parts of my soul just die off until nothing is left except a brief residue of the better person that I could have been?


As a side note in this video:  “Anorexic” is a medical term for a symptom, the loss of appetite and interest in food. It is not the same as “anorexia nervosa” which is a psychiatric disorder. In popular/lay use, people often say anorexia when what they are actually referring to is anorexia nervosa, which is where the apparent confusion comes from.



We Talked About This

I was going through my emails and saw these  prompt titles in the subject line.

The prompts themselves are actually more detailed and are not one word prompts, but together I saw an idea come together, so I went with it:

Peter Lippmann

Before he turned away

and they both knew that this time it would  be for good

his father said,

” Pick a door, any door  slam it shut behind you. Then nail it shut, set fire to it if you

want. I think you deserve to forget it was ever here. ”


Before he turned away

and he knew he would be back again soon

he saw the smooth plot of earth next to his Father’s grave

and he hoped against hope

he would never say those words

to his own Son one day.


But he knew he probably would.


Andrew Wyeth

Domino Watched For You


Domino 16 Weeks Old

When she was a puppy I watched her eyes shine

when she saw you, when she heard your voice,

when you reached down to pet her and reminded her she wasn’t a cat

like her big brother Wolfgang

whom she loved only second to you.


When she got older

and her health failed

she would sleep a lot and take short little walks

and happily wait for you to come home.

When she heard your car door slam and you whistled for her

she would get up and her eyes would shine.


And then Wolfie died and you went away

and that is when I think her heart really started to fail.

For a little while she would lift her head up when she heard a car door slam and she

would wait for your whistle

but of course it never came

and she would let her head fall back to her pillow and she would go back to sleep.


Her eyes, I remember, never really did shine after you left and my heart broke for her

and then part of it hardened.


Now when I think about Domino’s broken

heart and darkened eyes I think of you and my own heart doesn’t break.


It turns to stone.


Domino aged 14 years