Krampus- Karol of The Bells

It would not be Christmas without Krampus.

So today, to start off the Season, here’s a little tribute to my favorite Christmas legend.

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Children take care!
Please be aware
All that you’ve done
Will come to bear!

Have you been good?
Behaved as you should?
Those who have not
It’s understood

Krampus will come
Looking for some
You are not safe
Best that you run!

You’re on his list
Not what you wished
This Christmas time
You will be missed!

There is someone watching over all that you have done this year
Every little boy and girl please listen… Keep Christmas spirit alive!

If you believe
Given reprieve
Don’t lose your faith
Next Christmas Eve

Christmas is real
Show how you feel
If you forget
Your fate is sealed!

As you grow old
You have been told
Stay warm of heart
Keep out the cold

Now that you know
Reap what you sow
You have been warned
You have been warned!

All of you naughty children best prepare for some yuletide fear

This will be a very scary Christmas
If he finds you on his list
This will be a very scary Christmas
Quiet now I think he’s here!

 

Fifty Ways To Leave The White House

Some of us need to hear this song more then others.

The beauty of it is- we can all enjoy it.

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The problem is all inside your head, we all agree.
You were voted out so now you’re just a wannabe.
We’d like to doff your ass from public property.
There must be 50 ways to leave the White House.
You know, it’s really not my habit to intrude,
but the oval office ain’t the place for you to sit and brood.
It’s time to just move on beCause you’re redefining rude.
There must be fifty ways to leave the White House.
Fifty ways to leave the White House
What’s admitting that you lost cost?
Grow a pair and backtrack.
Let go of that plot you got.
There’s no foul play.
We can help you look for the door.
That’s what elections are for.
On your very last prey-day
just hit the highway.
So do your little pout flout
and and have a little vaunt flaunt.
It will not a thing bring
however you cling.
Slink away to your coast post.
That’s first and foremost.
This country’s not a king thing
even though it might sting.
You know, it grieves me so to see you cause more pain,
so there was something that we did so it cannot occur again.
And it is not a big surprise we must repeatedly explain
about the fifty ways
We watched you lie and cheat your way
through life for all those years.
And then you used the same approach to play
upon the country’s fears.
But now all that is done.
Can’t you hear the cheers?
There must be fifty ways to leave the White House.
Fifty ways to leave the White House
When that you weren’t picked clicks
Climb over that tall wall.
There’s nowhere to hide.
Biden knows the White House.
Just take a little backpack
or wait for the black jackets
to without a doubt out
both you and your spouse.
This is a required fired.
Get over your deny lie.
You’re about to be long-gone
‘cause your ass got beat.
Got the “didn’t wanna lose blues”
something you can’t refuse.

Written and Performed by Don Caron Executive Producers Sally Headley, Jack Heighway and Jerry Pender

Fandango’s Winner of the Week- Cootie Girl!

Ding Ding Ding- Winner Of The Week!

Photo by Mike on Pexels.com

Let’s just call her Cootie Girl.

Cootie Girl is one of many adult children in a family that are

Proud Anti-Vaxxers

Proud Anti-Maskers

and need I say, they are hardcore Trump Supporters.

Since March Cootie Girl and her ginormous family invite their friends over on the weekends to ‘support each other’ by getting together and ‘breaking bread and staying positive’

So over Thanksgiving Cootie Girl hung out with her Proud Anti Mask family and their friends and then…

she took a picture of herself delivering meals to the elderly later  while wearing the same mask she wears at work and hangs on her rearview mirror over night because that ‘kills the germs’.

I know this because she hangs out in the breakroom with her co-workers and maskless, Cootie Girl and her fellow Cooters swapped holiday stories with each other and word about what some might think is reckless behavior gets around.

They have told our mutual friends that they are ‘safe’ because they are together all day anyway and there is no way they’re spreading Covid-19.

Of course, Cootie Girl and the Cooters carpool at the end of the day and they don’t wear their masks- you know, the masks they have told each other you only have to let it air out because the germs die overnight if the mask isn’t on  your face.

My winner of this Fandango’s Winner of the Week is Cootie Girl and all of the Cooters who seem to do a better job of spreading a potentialy lethal Virus then common sense.