By The Lily Pond

Light Motifs II Thursday Inspiration 49-SHARP

Photo A.M. Moscoso

The  two women in brightly colored hiking gear  were walking on a trail through a sunny park named after a Priest.

The Sun was shining in a cloudless sky and it was warm- warm enough for the two of them to break a little sweat but not so warm that they had to break out their water bottles.

They strolled by  a pond full of lily pads and frogs, further down the trail there was another pond where a family of ducks swam in leisurely circles and dog walkers passed by them and smiled wide beautiful smiles.

The dogs.

Not the people.

” I can show you were the monsters live ” she told her friend who’s name is Tabitha.

Tabitha stopped and decided to play along with her friend’s joke. ” No way. No way do monsters live here. It’s to- it just to beautiful for them.”

” Well. There is a lot of room for-” her voice trailed off and she put her hand to her throat.

Tabitha thought that the flush she saw raising up from her friend’s neck to her cheeks was from the heat. She supposed it had gotten to her a little. ” For what? ” she laughed.

Felicity’s face turned red and little beads of sweat popped out on her cheeks.

” Here. Have some water,  you look a little warm.”

Felicity shook her head. ” Oh no. It’s not that. I just feel a little foolish. What a thing for an adult to say. I’m so embarrassed.  I was just being-”

” Fanciful?” Tabitha offered as she started back up the trail.

Felicity let her friend walk a little ahead of her and when Tabitha was a few feet away, Felicity reached behind her back and pulled something off of her belt clip.

Tabitha heard a sharp metal click and guessed Felicity was going to have that drink of water after all.

” Monsters wouldn’t live here. Too many mosquitos and who needs the competition? Felicity asked. ” It is a nice little hike all the same. Like I said, there’s lots of room to pretty much do whatever you want. Anyway,  I could use a snack right now. Is that ok?”

Tabitha was going to answer, in fact she tried to-

but the cut that Felicity  made on the front of Tabitha’ neck from ear to ear after she snuck up behind her, bumping into Tabitha just a little bit as she grabbed the back of her head by her ponytail, made it impossible for her to say anything at all.

Photo A.M. Moscoso

Photo A.M. Moscoso

Photo A.M. Moscoso

#lightm0tifs

The Smelly Dog Park

Fandango’s Provocative Question #62 What activities have you cut from your life since this pandemic started that you DON’T really miss?

Today I was considering what I have not missed since the Coronavirus showed up and I had to modify certain aspects of my day to day life.

But to be honest I didn’t have to modify it a lot.

In fact there have been a few upsides to this situation:

For example- I get more leg room on the train so that’s a big plus and I don’t have to make chit chat with my fellow commuters because I would rather be reading, but I also know you can get sort of weird if you don’t interact with people. So I put the book down and engage.

Another plus- there isn’t a lot of pushing and shoving out there because of the six foot rule. So that is a change that I really like. I’m going to hate to see that one fall to the side when things get better.

So what did I have to give up that I  don’t regret?

Anything?

Think. Think Think.

Oh here’s one.

The Smelly Dog Park.

My dog’s favorite dog park is smelly. It’s not smelly for the reason you may be thinking.

It’s smelly because people like to smoke their weed and cigarettes’ there and you can smell the exhaust from the cars from the main road.

Its gross I hate it, but Hamish loves it because it used to be a kids playground and he likes to play on the slide.

So BC ( Before Coronavirus ) I would give in and take Hamish there because it made him happy.

But my joy that  The Smelly Dog Park is closed is short lived because it  will eventually re-open and I will go back to taking  Hamish there because he loves it and I’m a sap.

Until then, I’m loving this- just don’t tell Hamish.

Photo A.M. Moscoso

#FPQ

 

Every Dog Has His Day

The Monday Peeve 28

Today’s Monday Peeve isn’t my peeve exactly.

It’s what ticks my dog off most of all in the entire world.

Photo A.M. Moscoso

Hamish is not put out by things like having to wear ‘the cone of shame’.

Photo A.M. Moscoso

He doesn’t exactly hate it when I make him wear hats- though he probably wishes I wouldn’t make him do it at all for any reason. But I’m the Mom so tough.

Photo A.M. Moscoso

What Hamish hates is my phone- he hates it when it rings, he hates it when I take pictures he hates it when I plug it in next to the couch.

 

Over the weekend Hamish Macbeth expressed his feelings about my phone:

 

This is a picture I took Hamish.

When I was done instead of saying ” in ” which was his cue to run into his play area I said ” drop it ” and he jumped up and grabbed my phone ( which he hates with the hatred that could fuel the Sun for a trillion years ) and dropped it.

Into the bushes.

Next to dog poo-which I am sure he very aware was there.

Photo A.M. Moscoso

Below is the picture  Hamish Macbeth took.

Did he run off after dropping my phone into the bushes next to the poo?

He did not.

He just sat there looking very pleased with himself.

Photo H. Macbeth

Every dog has his day…just ask Hamish Macbeth.

Photo A.M. Moscoso

#TMP

Above It All

RDP Sunday — HANG ON

On the cloudiest, stormiest most brutal days – above it all  is an improbably  blue sky and past that are the heavens and it is still full of stars and planets.

It’s all STILL there.

No matter how lonely or alone or cut off from the world you feel right now…remember that.

amm

PHOTO A.M. Moscoso

Photo A.M. Moscoso

Photo of Hamish Macbeth by A.M. Moscoso

Photo A.M. Moscoso

The Tourists

Thursday Inspiration-Island

RDP: Looking Within

Photo A.M. Moscoso

Isolation- Social Distancing-anxiety and panic.

That is the state of the world right now Unless you’re a Millennial who thinks you are immune from Covid-19 and shouldn’t be punished with the rest of us or you politics are such that you’re willing- as a minister in Arkansas said of his congregation- most of them are willing to lick the floor to prove this Virus isn’t real” then your world went from big and limitless to your home, your car and Netflix.

Some of us are finding creative ways to fill  your days, sending out words of encouragement to our friends that you are making it and they will too.

We are all in this together.

But here’s the kicker.

Some of us, the ones who suffer from depression, who have trouble connecting to a world that is so big and so vast and so overwhelming that it feels like your in a box and that box gets smaller everyday- this world the one we are all in right now seems horribly familiar.

I’ve been in that unquiet world- off and on over the years.

I’ve been isolated. I have distanced myself from the people around me-this six foot distance thing was a snap for me to embrace because I had done it already. Anxiety and her brother Panic used to visit me often. I could be  watching TV sitting in my car, walking my dog and BOOM there they’d be.

Now  it feels  as if the world I had been living in inside of my head somehow found it’s way to the world around me and now it has a physical presence.

So here is the thing.

It’s been awhile since I’ve suffered from severe depression, but I remember how it felt.

Most important of all, I found ways to deal with Isolation.

That’s why when my friends are talking about struggling with this isolation, how they miss being connected to the world around them and the anxiety of not knowing when it will end, I am truly sympathetic. I really do feel your pain.

But this world doesn’t scare me- I’ve been to one almost exactly like it often and even though I haven’t been there for a few years I might find myself there again.

At that point people won’t be locked down in their homes, they’ll return to their lives and going to restaurants and they won’t be obsessing over toilet paper and who provides unattended delivery service.

As for me  I don’t have that luxury. I can end up back in this world upside down place- because sometimes my brain just fails me. Luckily for me, I usually find my way back so I can say for sure that it can be done.

Recently I have been going over a line from one of my favorite Movies- Barton Fink.

At the end of Barton Fink, his friend Charlie Meadows ( who has demons of his own-in fact I guess you could say he IS one ) turns to Barton and says before he walks down the hall  to his burning room:

Charlie Meadows : Take a look around this dump. You’re just a tourist with a typewriter, Barton. I live here.

 

People are isolated, they are feeling overwhelmed and they can look at the world around them but they can’t touch it.

What they don’t realize is that most of them will get to go back to their lives.

But I’m like Charlie, I’m not a tourist in this world.

I’ve  have room next to Charlie’s and sometimes, whether I want to or not- I go back there.

amm

 

 

One Liner Wednesday- Is Anybody Out There?

One-Liner Wednesday – A Challenge

Photo A.M. Moscoso

When we were advised to isolate ( I was watching a news show, don’t remember which one) and told  how hard it was going to be,  I was sitting next to my dog on my couch,

I looked at him.

Then he looked at me.

And we both laughed-well, I laughed my dog licked my face and started to run in circles. He likes it when I laugh. He’s a weirdo.

Anyway, most of my time is spent alone- I work alone, I write alone, I walk my dog alone, now that I’ve taken my guitar back up I really don’t have a lot of time to socialize and I’m good with that.

Don’t get me wrong, when I’m around family and some of my friends I enjoy it. But to be honest it wears on me because I’m not used to it.

My life might be solitary but it’s not empty.

In fact, I’d love to have some free time to do nothing but I can’t imagine what that ‘nothing’ would look like so I haven’t done a lot to figure that out.

Now my FB newsfeed if full of posts and pictures of people struggling with isolation-cabin fever, having to see the same walls day in and day out.

I was surprised. I honestly thought people would take to this new state of being like a fish to water. People are always looking into their phones, or talking about what they saw on their phones and sharing stuff with each other-from their phones. I don’t see a lot of human interaction going on around me.

So why the stress? Why the pictures of people sitting around in their fleece pajamas looking sad faced or the stories about ‘having to get out’. You could have knocked me over with a feather.

People miss being around other people?

Really?

So what do people actually miss?

Do they miss each other, or do they miss that line, that cord they could grab when they went out further and further away from each other every single time they pulled out their phones and dove into those tiny little screens.

Were people so willing to leave the world around them because they thought they could go back to the old one- the one where you have to take your turn to talk in conversations. The real world where you can’t burn someone to the ground because they don’t agree with your political views or your brand of humor.

After watching my friends struggle with this new- yet temporary existence- I think I have learned that when we let ourselves drift or leave or disengage that the line we think we can rely on to find out way back can one day get yanked right out of our hands -and when it does you might not be in any shape to fashion yourself a new one.

Now I think that when I lose myself in a world of writing or music or books I’m going to put my head up a lot more often and maybe go outside and get lost in  that world  for a spell.

From what I remember, it’s a nice place.

Photo A.M Moscoso