Does anyone really want to talk about being lonely?
So lonely your bones hurt, your eyes sort of wander around in their sockets and it hurts when you take a breath because what’s the point so you sort of slouch and when you take that breath and realize you’re alive and your only thought is:
” well that sucks “.
People do want to talk about it, the problem is who wants to hear about it?
People will gorge themselves to the point of puking up their internal organs on poems, songs, books and movies about loneliness and depression,
They will hang paintings, admire sculptures and read books and attended classes to go over the lives and deaths of people who have committed suicide, died in mental hospitals.
But if that same writer or artist or musician had sat down next to them at work, or a family gathering and said, ” You know I’m having a really bad day.” Would they want that in their heads, want to see through their eyes the same way?
I’ve been told, over the years that we need to think about ourselves first, one can’t be strong for others unless they are strong in themselves- because you know- you first.
So don’t let people drag you down.
I call bullshit on that.
You know how when you are on a plane and they give you the speech about what do in case of an emergency landing ( I like the way they don’t use the word CRASH ).
First they tell you what to do in a water landing ( considering the most airtime I’ve spent in the recent past has been from Washington state to Nevada I sort of tune that out )
And then they explain that when the oxygen masks drop you should put your mask on first and then if the person next to you needs help, you put their mask on.
On one trip I asked my sister, ” Could you do that? Put your mask on if you saw Mom or your daughters struggling for air? Make them wait? “
My sister says to me, ” Could you?”
” No fucking way.”
So this brings me back to the question, when someone is cut off and they are in an emotional Hell and I can see it do I walk away? Put my mask on first? Take care of me?
I’ve done it twice in my life.
I have no intention of going for three.