Tell Your Grandfather I Said Hello

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On Christmas Eve my Sister and our Mom and my nieces went to the cemetery to set flowers on our Dad’s grave.

It was cold that day- bright and cold.

My nieces joined my sister at the graveside and one of my nieces looked down at her Grandfather’s grave and didn’t quite shout:

” Grandma stayed in the car. She’s cold. She said to say hi.”

 

When they told me that, I cracked up.

Why n0t.

Dad would have too.

 

Vilhelm Hammershøi,

Vilhelm Hammershøi,

 

When I got to my Sister’s place later that day I let my dog out of the car and he took a victory lap around her yard and then he peed on her inflatable Rudolph.  I called him back before he could whiz on her Santa but I may have been to late. I can’t be sure. My eyes were closed. Seeing him pee on a happy Rudolph so wrong.

That night when she hit the switch and the inflatable decorations started to fill with air and come to life Rudolph took the longest.

We watched him struggle to come to life and then he simply gave it up and started to shrink.

” I think Hamish’s pee killed him.” I said wondering how many other people were stringing those words together on Christmas Eve.

My sister loves my dog. ” No.  I saw Rudolph’s Soul leave his eyes yesterday. It’s sad. I wonder if I can get one on sale after Christmas?”

I looked down at Hamish and he was wagging his tail.

” And here people think I’m the morbid one. I am outing you guys. ” I looked down at my dog. ”  You too.”

They both walked into the house and my sister was laughing- or it could have been my dog.

It was one of those nights when the odd and macabre came joined my fmaily Christmas Festivities and to be honest-

I wouldn’t have expected it to be otherwise.

My Niece and Hamish Macbeth- aka The Rudolph Slayer

My Niece and Hamish Macbeth- aka The Rudolph Slayer

 

 

 

Cleanup With Krampus

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I suppose that Cleaning Up after Christmas can be a chore, but does it have to be?

When I was young and we had to do clean up we actually had a lot of fun.

If you did kitchen cleanup you poured yourself a drink and hid in the kitchen and told wild stories and dirty jokes and butchered Christmas Songs with your own off colored versions.

It used to get so noisy and we carried on so much that before you knew it, the kitchen was full of people who wanted in on the fun and hey presto it was clean and you could take the Merry Making out into the living room where…

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anything that was flammable went straight into the fireplace- we were not a green recycling family back in the day.

We were just really, really fond of fire.

The only problem we had was one year THE ADULTS of which I was not one of yet- had downed some Christmas Sprits in the kitchen and were so happy that they forgot to open up the chimney flue and it got a tad bit smokey.

Okay, it was really smokey but considering  most of my family used to smoke I don’t think they noticed or cared. I mean, they weren’t exactly gasping for air. They probably inhaled most of it and then blew smoke jets out of the window and open doors.

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I guess my point to this story is that you make your fun during the Holidays in a lot of different and creative ways.

I personally think that’s what having the Christmas Spirit is all about.

You  can have fun when your scraping food off of plates, when you race out to the garbage cans with no shoes on because you’re too busy to put your snow boots on and you don’t want to lose a second of your time lacing them up or even LOOKING for them or when you dump a plate full of your Aunt’s famous homemade bourbon balls into that roaring fire place because you like the way they smell when they burn.

So if you’re clearing up or cleaning up or watching somebody else do it because you are the sharpest knife in the rack, make it fun.

And don’t forget to share the story at your next Holiday Clean Up.

It will be fun, trust me on that.

 

Our Random View Christmas Prompt: Christmas Cleanup

A Bike, The Mumps and Christmas Snow

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So much snow, so many memories-

When I was 8  I came down with the mumps just before Christmas.

I got to stay home from school, and I spent most of my time drinking soda pop and coloring. It was great. My Mom bought me a ton of coloring books and paper dolls and I had our family dog Punky all to myself.

The only fly in the ointment was that year it wasn’t even cold enough to frost the windows let alone snow.

Then on Christmas Eve there was a cold snap and wouldn’t you know it? It started to snow.

My Dad bundled my brother and sister in their winter gear and took them for a walk in the snow with the dog and they left me at home with my stupid crayons and paper dolls. I stood in front of the living room window and  watched them merrily break a path in the new snow, which did indeed twinkle in the moonlight.

I didn’t say a word.

Then I went into my bedroom/jail cell and wrote a letter to Santa:

 

Dear Santa,

I hope you crash your sleigh and I hope your Reindeer get rabies and eat you.

Anita

 

I stuck my letter in my Christmas stocking and went to bed.

I woke up sometime in the night and I heard my Dad and his cousin laughing.

” That girl is a piece work ” one of them said and as I fell back to sleep I’m pretty sure I agreed.

 

The next morning I rolled out of bed, I put my robe on inside out and didn’t wear my slippers- which were pink and spectacular because they had little puppies all over them. I put one snow boot on and stalked out to the living room.

When I got out there, right next to the tree was what I had been asking for since the previous Christmas- a new bike.

It was lime green and had a gears and it had tiny little pale green daisies on the frame.

I was in love.

I sat next to my bike and opened my other presents- it was a haul- I got a rock tumbler, roller skates an etch a sketch, a butterfly yo-yo and a purple yo-yo. I even got a couple of Barbies, Sea Monkeys and a crystal growing kit.

My Mom pointed out my mumps would be gone soon and maybe the snow will have melted and I could take my bike and skates out and try them out.

I was in such a good mood I agreed.

Did I mention I got a Shrunken Head kit too?

We cleaned up the paper and started in on the treats and I took my bike to the pantry and where there was a back door that led to the back yard.

I guess someone looked up and saw me flying by the window in one boot, one slipper, my inside out robe on my new bike down the snow and ice filled street.

I’m not sure how long I was out there, but by the time I got home I had a huge bump on my forehead a couple more on the back of my head and I had sprained my ankle.

Plus side is, I got a couple of candy canes and a color book from the Nurse at the Doctor’s office.

For the rest of the night my Mom and Grandma kept waking me up and asking me my name and I almost ended up back in the hospital when I said, ” Emma Peel “.

 

So there it is- a snow memory and one of my best memories ever.

Apparently my parents thought it was pretty great too because years later I found my Santa Bite Me letter in a box with the Christmas ornaments.

As you can see,  my weirdness didn’t pop out of thin air.

The Holly Berry doesn’t fall far from the Holly Tree.

 

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Our Random View: Christmas Prompt Snow