No Words

After losing two of his dogs suddenly in the last few years, my cousin and Lexus  ( X-Man ) came into each other’s lives.

Lexus is John’s pride and joy even though he had all the  makings of John’s other champion show dogs, Lexus seemed to take on the role as a companion and was a couch dog.

Lex was a big dog but he really was John’s little boy.

Photo John Cox

My cousin passed away in May.

He was grooming Lexus when his heart failed.

When they found John shortly after his heart attack, Lexus was laying next to him- of course Lexus knew John had passed on but he stayed with him all the same.  I’m sure Lexus heart was broken, I’m sure he knew when it was that my cousin had truly left. I felt sorry that Lexus would never be able to tell his story.

But as I thought about John and Lexus I remembered that I’ve sat with friends and family who had passed on or were in the process of leaving us and the thoughts I’ve had I’ve never really shared with anyone because words can’t capture that moment and maybe they’re not meant to.

I suppose then, that Lexus doesn’t need to say a word.

I know how he feels.

John and Lexus

RDP SUNDAY MEDITATE

My Besties Have Always Been Beasties

All of my besties have had four legs, giant hearts and more kindness in one toe bean then exists in the entire Universe.

I know. I am lucky- and more grateful for them then I can put into words- so I’ll share pictures of them instead.

Hamish Macbeth- he is truly a gift from the Gods.
12-17-2023
Photo A.M. Moscoso

Wolfgang: My one and true spirit animal
Photo A.M. Moscoso

Domino, best girl EVER.

Cerberus, my sweet girl-a more gentle giant has never existed
Photo A.M. Moscoso

Hamish Macbeth and Micey (2015)

Darwin- thought he was a dog- he was Cerbie’s ‘puppy’
Photo A.M. Moscoso

Blitzer In A Tree- such a spooky and wonderful boy
Photo A.M. Moscoso

Carl Kolchak- so named because he turned up at my warehouse which is part of the Seattle Undergound System and the setting  for the first ” Night Stalker ‘ movie featuring Carl Kolchak as The Night Stalker.
Photo A.M. Moscoso

Sham – My wonderful boy- always in my heart and still has my back. I bought him with my babysitting money. 
1977

RDP Friday: BESTIE

Charles’ Ears

RDP Friday: Functional

Source – @3am.horrors on Instagram

I struggle with each year to enjoy the Christmas season.

I used to have a good time and I really threw myself into the entire experience but life is life and when a couple of toxic people burn you life to the ground, it’s hard to jump up and say, ” ho, ho, ho and Merry Christmas y’all!”

I wish I could say I was a stronger person and could rise about the ruins they created, but I haven’t. It’s a struggle. But hey, what’s one more struggle when you’re already fighting the tide?

So.

When I put up my tree, I decorate it with grim determination,  but I put it up.

When I listen to Christmas music the first thought that pops into my head is, ” I really used to l like this song. ” I tell that little thought that it had it’s moment in the Sun and I turn the music up louder.

When someone wishes me a Merry Christmas I say to myself, ” From your lips to Charles’ Dickens ears ” – no snark, I really think and MEAN that.

I’m not sure if this process of mine means I’ve come up with a solid and functional plan to take back a part of my life that used to bring me a lot of joy, or if I should just pack it in.

I’m really not sure but I guess I’ll just keep moving forward and see where I end up.

Harsh Reality

Would you give up your home, your health, would you eat less and work more

would you be willing to be one of those poor broken people who dies on the bus on the way to your 1 or 2 jobs

in order to secure the happiness, the well being, the promise of a good life

for one ( take your pick ) of the richest families in the United States?

Not YOUR family, mind you.

A lot of people made the choice to do just that and I will never understand WHY.

I guess I am just selfish to the marrow of my bones.

RDP Monday: Austere