If you could spend the holidays anywhere in the world, where would you go?
It’s always been a plan of mine to go away to an exotic place where there is no snow or shopping malls or wrapping paper. I’d leave in secret and when I got there I’d send my family a postcard that said:
” I’m in Egypt digging up Mummies! And guess what! I found my first Mummy today. Super excited. I hope it’s not cursed.
HA HA HA
Would my family be surprised I’d choose to spend Christmas taking dead bodies out of their graves?
I used to put them into graves for a living. So it’s not a big stretch.
But they’d probably ask if I missed the Snow and I’d reply:
“Saw the Sphinx and I found out something ultra cool about it. Nobody can believe it. I can’t. But it’s true… oh…
Before I forget I wanted to share with you all that I swallowed so many bugs today that if I burped, I think I’d end up starting one of those bible things where the bugs show up and the world ends.
There aren’t enough Tic Tacs in the world to get rid of the stench coming out of my mouth.
I would also share with my family that after I made some historical discoveries involving dozens of mummies.
However, I would say;
” I think that using my Voodoo Dolls to find those mummies wasn’t one of my best ideas. You might want to stock up on the salt and holy water Oh. Don’t believe what you see about me on TV”
Be Home Soon.