That Time At The Dinner Party

:::Holidailies Prompt:::

If you could change, undo, or modify one decision in your past, which would it be and why?

A few years ago I was at a dinner party.

After the meal we were all moved to the living room and from there we sniffed butts just like dogs-okay- didn’t sniff butts.

We sat in this sort of circle and the way everyone introduced themselves was to state – with your chin pointed slightly up in the air  and your jaw almost locked -where you went to college.

Then you mentioned your name.

I’d have rather sniffed a butt when it came to my turn.

 I said, ” I’m sorry, I didn’t go to college.”

I freaking apologized! What the Hell was I thinking? I wanted to go back to the dining room table, grab a knife and cut my tongue out.

One of the guests looked surprised, ” Oh, I had no idea. You’re so well spoken and articulate.”

” I’m part Asian. ” I said.

One woman patted me on the arm.  When she had my attention he leaned over and twinkled her eyes at me” A little bird told me you do some writing .”

I think she was trying to ‘help me’ into the conversation but I wasn’t having it.

” Did the little bird tell you the rest of the time I embalm bodies and in a pinch I get sent in to work at the crematory? You only have to be a highschool graduate to do that kind of work. The only hard part in doing cremations is to remember not sneeze when you’re putting the ashes in the urn.”


So if I could change anything from that moment in time,  I wouldn’t have apologized for not being a College graduate. I wouldn’t have made my job sound like a joke.

I should have unapologetically rattled off my history as a musician, as a funeral director and as a writer- all three are things I worked very hard to accomplish.

I should have said so.


4 thoughts on “That Time At The Dinner Party

  1. For over a decade and a half I worked a 40 hour week and went to night school to get a couple of college degrees, and you know what? It didn’t make a flipping bit of difference to some individuals. To them I will always be just trash. I learned that class and classiness have nothing to do with education.

    • It’s a shame people act like that, it’s like they’re taking this wonderful opportunity and treating it like a car or a trophy wife/husband.

      I think you’re awesome Lori.

      • Awwww, shucks. You’re awesome too. If you watch Downton Abbey, I am like Daisy and her goal of self education. Education opened my eyes too. You do it for that reason, not to impress anyone.

  2. I remember being at a graduation party for a nephew and sitting at a table where suddenly the discussion turned to where everyone went to college. I could totally tell the woman who started it was using it an an exercise in fishing for intellect, like she was gauging our value by where we went. I think I left to take a leak before she got to me because I didn’t need her assuming I was unworthy because I didn’t go to some Ivy League school.

    Not saying that college has no value, but as I go through life, I see how little value it has when it comes to people just being decent and doing the best they can at whatever they do. Some of the best writers I know don’t have college degrees.They just write (and read) a lot and have a passion for it.

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