The Tree

It doesn’t matter now who said it or why, but back when it mattered I was told that I bought stupid, meaningless Christmas presents and that the trees I picked out were wrong too.

Oh- and my decorations were ugly.

So every year I bought gift cards- to play it safe and  I put up a tree and decorated it and in then I  grit my teeth and ignored it until the 26th.

On that day I pull the thing down an toss the ornaments into a bucket -they’re the unbreakable plastic ones and I pull the tree apart ( its fake and come away in three  parts) and I sort of spin the segments and unwind the lights into little ready to unwind balls of lights and toss the entire kit and kaboodle into the storage closet.

The feeling I have is split between elation and relief- neither one seems appropriate.

So for my own reasons I’m trying to improve my attitude about the Christmas season because I really did come to absolutely hate it.

I’ve taken to doing things like reading ghost stories and looking for Krampus decorations. I listen to hours of  Christmas music because nobody has managed to ruin that for me. I even send out real Christmas cards.

Now when I put up my tree I sort of do it in stages- first night I put the lights on and on the second I decorate it.

I wanted to make it fun again  and splitting the task keeps it from feeling like a task and I don’t get overwhelmed by those nasty shadows from Christmas past.

Sometimes I put a movie on while I work- this year I pulled Dexter up and binged watched my favorite season ( last year it was Lucifer ) and then I take pictures of the tree with my dog.

When I think about my trees now, I remember what shows I was watching- and they are good ones- and I have pictures of Hamish Macbeth and my ugly, badly decorated tree that I actually had fun working on.

I’m hoping that I”ll have a  year when I will realize that it’s ‘that time of the year’ and be excited about it. Being that Christmas is a pretty great thing to take part in, I’m willing to work on that.

It is worth it.

Photo A.M. Moscoso


Photo A.M. Moscoso

Photo A.M. Moscoso

One thought on “The Tree

  1. Nox Arcana has three wonderful winter/Christmas albums worth listening to. An acquaintance always watches “The Abominable Dr. Phibes” while decorating the tree. Another uses Halloween baubles on the tree. Lots of options.

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