Every Christmas and every New Years I go into the season thinking it’s time to make a fresh start of it- expand on the good things, toss out the bad.
Celebrate it all and move into the New Year open to whatever comes my way.
Before she died my Aunt suffered from severe depression.
I remember I was watching her draw ( she was a very talented artist) and I was telling her how I was doing a lot of writing and I hoped to write books one day.
She looked so sad and she said, ” People in our family all had dreams and none of them ever came true.”
She died a year later.
That’s what her New Years brought her- despair, grief, sadness and death. I wish she could have known more then that in her 39 years of life.
When I think about ringing in the New Year, that anything is possible so why can’t that anything be great? I remember that last conversation with my Aunt and I wonder if I’m just fooling myself.
Is New Years is just another date that we face with all of the despair and pain and sadness from the year before. Or do we get a clean slate, a chance to start anew.
I’m not sure.
I wish I was.